Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Review: Veins, by Lawrence C. Connolly

There is no such thing as the perfect crime.

This is one of the lessons hard-learned when a group of small-time crooks get into big-time trouble in Lawrence C. Connolly’s Veins.

Reddy, Tejay and Spinelli have set their sites on a briefcase full of cash, the property of Bird, a young man obsessed with his heritage and a mean streak as long as a backwoods dirt road.

With Tejay providing all the inside information on Bird’s “gambling” habits, Spinelli providing the brains and Reddy on-hand as extra muscle, the only thing this gang of wannabe criminals needs is a wheelman to help make the getaway.

Enter Axle, a young Native American with a floundering business and a cherry Ford Mustang, as well as the knowhow to guide the mechanical beast through the twists and turns of a small Pennsylvania town at breakneck speeds.

What begins as a simple stop-and-grab affair quickly devolves into a high-speed, bullet-riddled chase leading into the heart of an old coal mine where past will meet present and beings of legend will have a hand in the fate of everyone involved.

Monday, September 27, 2010

Monday mini-movies: Cat eats corn edition

It's been a while since I've posted anything adorable.

This is my apology.

Friday, September 24, 2010

UFC 119: Mir vs. Cro Cop- Ryan calls it

Being short on time and, with UFC 119: Mir vs. Cro Cop just a day away, I decided to take the “lazy bastard” approach to fight predictions and just flip a coin. The sad thing is, this quarter is likely to do a better job of predicting the outcome of these five fights than I would have, were I to give it my usual, deep analysis. I think my best record in the past year has been three-for-five.

Before me lays a sort of twister-board-of-pain, featuring a variety of finishes broken into rows and columns with “decision victory” peppered throughout. In retrospect, I probably would have had time to do these predictions justice had I not wasted so much of it creating this intricate graph.

Anyway, with the simple flip of a coin and, based on where it lands, I shall now make my predictions for UFC 119.

Be sure to click after the break to find out the results.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Weezer: Hurley (Review)

This must be the year of redemption. Eminem regained his credibility with Recovery earlier this year, Korn put together a decent album a few months back and, following a string of mediocre offerings and last year’s abomination, Raditude, Weezer has also managed to make a triumphant return to form with their latest, Hurley.

Leave it to Weezer to name a CD after a character from Lost, going so far as to splash his mug across the album cover as well. It’s pretty much the awesomely nerdy, offbeat sort of thing you’d expect from the band.

Name and cover art aside, what matters here is the fact Rivers Cuomo and company have provided fans with what they have been waiting and hoping for: A solid album.

Monday, September 20, 2010

Monday mini-movies: Four chord edition

Watching this video was something of a revelation for me.

I never even realized how many songs relied on the same four chord progression until the Axis of Awesome put together this impressive compilation.

Seriously…Get ready to have your mind blown for five minutes of “holy crap, it’s true” moments.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

This week in Joystick Division

It was a pretty big week for video games and, more specifically, me playing them. Joystick Division put up my Lord of the Rings Online feature highlighting my first hours in the officially free-to-play massive multiplayer online roleplaying game (or MMORPG, if you prefer). Since writing the piece, I've spent an embarrassing amount of time in digital Middle Earth, murdering countless goblins and running countless errands for lazy NPCs. It's been a blast.

I also got some hands on time with the new God of War for PSP and the upcoming Ninja Theory title Enslaved. Both look like they're going to be a load of fun to play once they ship later this year.

These stories, along with the usual random assortment of updates, can be found linked below.

Be sure to check out throughout the week for all your video game news.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Sick day: Five things to occupy a gamer's time

I've been sick for a couple days now and it's starting to drive me mad.

I'm sure we all have a list of things we would do in the event of faking a sick day, but what happens when you're actually sick, groggy, and unable to put forth much effort beyond glugging loads of orange juice and keeping up a steady diet of chicken noodle soup?

If you're like me, you hate letting a day go to waste, even if you are stricken with a cold. Therefore, I've put together a little list of things that might help you get through those long hours of achy nothingness.

Monday, September 13, 2010

Monday mini-movies: Potter Puppet Pals edition

This is another one of those “why did it take me so long to think to post this as a Monday mini-movie” moments. (Ah, alliteration.)

So, yes. Potter Puppet Pals. You watch now. Is fun.

Also, check out even more puppetty shenanigans by clicking on this here.

Saturday, September 11, 2010

This week in Joystick Division

This might be the most random assortment of posts I've ever been responsible for. From Hello Kitty Online to car combat, Duke Nukem and Transformers, It's truly been seven days to be proud of.

While this is just a collection of my most recent posts, don't forget to add Joystick Division to your favorites for regular gaming updates throughout the day.

Sept. 5-11
Yahtzee's book, Mogworld, set to release
War for Cybertron map pack 2
Call of Duty: Black Ops gets a star-studded cast
Holy $#!&, Duke Nukem Forever is coming out
EA Sports MMA gets a demo
My review of Dead Space: Martyr
Knights in the Nightmare pushed back, gets added game
Hello Kitty Online holds event to benefit real-world charities
Blood Drive releases this November
Machinarium coming to WiiWare

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Review- Dead Space: Martyr, by B.K. Evenson

Dead Space: Martyr, by B. K. Evenson, is a pretty easy recommendation for fans of the video game franchise it’s based on. For those unfamiliar with the world and its history, however, it’s a more difficult sale.

In the game, you blast your way through an army of Necromorphs, horrible creatures mutated from the bodies of the dead. You learn that the whole mess got started because of a mysterious object called the “Marker,” which is also a holy icon for Unitologists, a religious group that believes these grotesque events are simply a step on the road to convergence, or a oneness of the species.

The game packs a lot more brains and story than most of its ilk so, naturally, publisher Electronic Arts has decided to flesh things out in a variety of ways. There has already been a spin-off title for the Wii, a series of comics and an animated feature film dedicated to unraveling more of Dead Space’s mysteries. An interactive comic is releasing shortly, followed by a graphic novel in December and, in early 2011, Dead Space 2.

So, yes, there’s a lot to digest in this world where the dead never stay down and a headshot is about as helpful as a pat on the back. But what we’re here to talk about today is the novel, Dead Space: Martyr.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Games to get in September

Ready your wallets, boys and girls, for the gaming flood of 2011 is officially upon us.

Each year, the “holiday window” seems to start a little bit earlier. With any luck, this means we’re only a few years away from having all the quality titles spread out through the entire year rather than crammed into the final quarter in hopes of gobbling up the largest portion of Christmas sales.

This month sees the launch of Sony’s entry to the motion control market as well as a slew of big-name games.

No matter what genre you prefer or system you play on, September has something to offer just about everyone.

7th- Kingdom Hearts: Birth by Sleep (PSP)
7th- Sports Champions (PS3)
12th- Professor Layton and the Unwound Future (DS)
14th- Halo: Reach (360)
19th- PlayStation Move
28th- Front Mission Evolved (PS3, 360)
28th- Dead Rising 2 (PS3, 360)
28th- Fifa 11 (PS3, 360, Wii)
30th- Tom Clancy’s Ghost Recon: Predator (PSP)

Monday, September 6, 2010

Monday mini-movies: Fake Green Lantern trailer edition

I forgot Ryan Reynolds is playing The Green Lantern in the upcoming film adaptation of the comic and stumbled upon the above trailer by accident.

Without noticing the “this is a fan-made trailer” warning, I had my mind blown for a good minute before realizing, “Wasn’t that a scene from Serenity?...And wasn’t that a scene from Star Trek?...And wasn’t that a scene from-Ooooooooh.” I spent the rest of the time continuing to have my mind blown by how much effort this must have taken.

So, yeah, this is pretty awesome and I think the folks responsible deserve loads of attention for creating such an impressive bit of fake advertising.

Now let’s just hope the actual The Green Lantern movie shows as much love for the story and attention to detail as the fan-made trailer.

Saturday, September 4, 2010

This week in Joystick Division

Stranger returns to PSN
Lots of news in the gaming world this week and still more to come as PAX rages on through the weekend.

Here's your weekly dose of stuff I put together for Joystick Division in the past seven days. Remember to add the site to your favorites and check back frequently for gaming news throughout the day.

Seriously, this is all we do. We post about games and paint our toenails. It's fantastic.

Aug. 29 -- Sept. 4
Playstation Move gets new tech demo
God of War: Ghost of Sparta box art revealed
Modnation holds double XP week
Golden Sun: Dark Dawn set to ship
Nintendo handhelds get a price drop
Tik Games/ Creat hold sale
Pinball FX2 hitting XBLA
Get Zeno Clash on the cheap
Battle vs. Chess set to change the game
Mortal Kombat "Shadows" trailer
Final Fantasy XIV beta begins
Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga'Hool gets a demo
Crackdown 2 add Toy Box DLC
RZA joins DJ Hero 2
John Daly's ProStroke Golf inbound
Kevin Butler shows off Move in new ad
Oddworld: Stranger's Wrath coming to PSN

Friday, September 3, 2010

Movies to miss in September

This is actually shaping up to be a pretty decent month for terrible movies.

With yet another sequel to the Resident Evil franchise, a second-rate-looking animated film and something with M. Night Shamamamamalamalan tied to the project, movie-goers everywhere have several piles of poop to carefully side-step in the weeks ahead.

Be sure to head after the break for my thoughtful, detailed analysis of each.

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Read it: Locke and Key, The Stuff of Legend, Whispers in the Wall, Hotwire, Scarlett, X-Files/30 Days of Night

It's time for another round-up of comic reviews. Here's a look at a couple first issues and a few more beginnings to new arcs in ongoing series. I've got to start doing these individually. This is way too much content for a single post.

Locke and Key: Keys to the Kingdom
I'm starting to feel like a broken record shouting my love for this series to the mountain tops but, when a team provides such consistently fantastic work, I can't help but want to give them as much attention as I possibly can.

Locke and Key is, quite simply, the best reason to read current comics. Joe Hill has crafted a magical story of loss, love, terror and keys that can unlock more than your imagination. He's accompanied by the obnoxiously talented Gabriel Rodriguez, who puts together panels and pages better than just about anyone in the business. His characters are strong, their expressions speak volumes, the settings are gorgeous and the action is meticulously detailed.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

The Walking Dead hits AMC Oct. 31

The Walking Dead is one of those comics I missed in the beginning and, years later and nearly 100 issues late, I’ve had trouble getting myself to catch up on.

I know. I’m a sinner. Just about any comic fan you talk to these days will tell you it’s one of the best books going.

I plan on correcting my error someday soon but, if nothing else, I’ve learned from my mistake. The Walking Dead has been turned into a television series for AMC and, this time, I plan on being there from the beginning.