UFC 119: Mir vs. Cro Cop- Ryan calls it

Being short on time and, with UFC 119: Mir vs. Cro Cop just a day away, I decided to take the “lazy bastard” approach to fight predictions and just flip a coin. The sad thing is, this quarter is likely to do a better job of predicting the outcome of these five fights than I would have, were I to give it my usual, deep analysis. I think my best record in the past year has been three-for-five.

Before me lays a sort of twister-board-of-pain, featuring a variety of finishes broken into rows and columns with “decision victory” peppered throughout. In retrospect, I probably would have had time to do these predictions justice had I not wasted so much of it creating this intricate graph.

Anyway, with the simple flip of a coin and, based on where it lands, I shall now make my predictions for UFC 119.

Be sure to click after the break to find out the results.

Melvin Guillard vs. Jeremy Stephens
Interesting. According to the Washington/Eagle delegation, Guillard is going to best Stephens with a rear naked choke. That wouldn’t have been my first guess, but who am I to argue with the nation’s first president and a feathered symbol of freedom?

Sean Sherk vs. Evan Dunham
Mr. Washington seems to believe Sherk will dominate Dunham with a barrage of blows from the mount position…I’m not sure I would argue with that one. Good call, el Presidente.

Matt Serra vs. Chris Lytle
Okay, toupee man, you’re starting to hog the lime light. The coin actually bounced off the board this time so, according to the official rules, I get to make up the most elaborate ending I can come up with in five seconds. So, come round three, Serra will morph into a grizzly bear and maul Lytle before dropping to the ground and finding the submission. I’m feeling pretty confident about this one.

Antonio Noguira vs. Ryan Bader
The Eagle decides to show up late to the party. Personally, I think he’s wrong about Bader winning via standing strikes, but hey, that’s just me. Go Nog!

Frank Mir vs. Mirko Cro Cop
Really, Eagle? You’re calling this one in favor of Cro Cop via arm bar? That just doesn’t seem like his style. If you would have said “kicking Mir in the head until he falls asleep,” I wouldn’t have thought twice. But arm bar? Really?