Friday, September 4, 2009

Movies to miss in September

This month, movie-goers are being treated to a trifecta of terrible in the form of Sandra Bullock, Tyler Perry and a horrible horror movie remake. Score!

All About Steve- While I’ll agree Sandra Bullock is still a looker, I can’t help but be saddened by all these roles where her character acts like she’s in her mid-20s. The woman is nearly 50 and, I’m sorry, but the oddball cute girl thing just isn’t working out. It’s like having someone’s mom show up to a party dressed in the latest fashion, ready to dance the night away with all the hip youngsters. Sad, scary and anything but entertaining.

Sorority Row- I’ll give you a second to go ahead and soak in that poster. Is it just me, or do those girls look dead already? I’m sure that was the “point,” but even the acting in the damn photo is terrible. This is looking like a cross between Jawbreaker and I Know What You Did Last Summer and, if all other horror movie remakes can serve as s gauge, will likely poop all over the original film it’s based on.

Tyler Perry’s I Can Do Bad All By Myself- I couldn’t have said it better myself, Tyler. At what point do we as a society have a responsibility to stop this nonsense? We hit my personal Perry threshold a few years ago. Either everyone else has a higher tolerance for suck than I do, or there are actually enough people out there who enjoy this crap to warrant its continued existence. That’s quite enough, Mr. Perry. Quite enough, indeed.


Pepper said...

Jawbreaker was a great movie! Judy Greer IS A SAINT!

-Ryan Winslett said...

I loved Jawbreaker too. The first IKWYDLS, as well. Sorry if it made it sound otherwise. I was just saying the plot felt like a mix of two other films.