Friday, February 4, 2011

Movies to miss in February

Craptastic cinema has been pretty dry through the past few months, but that's all about to change thanks to a bountiful February.

Justin Bieber: Never Say Never
Not even if it's in the sentence "You should never see this movie?" To be fair, I'm not exactly the target demographic for this particular film, but that doesn't mean I can't take this opportunity to openly state my dislike of Sr. Bieber and the effect he's had on people like my sweet, innocent niece. Based on his autobiography (because he's already lived such a long and storied life, you know), I expect theaters to sound like a cave full of disgruntled bats through the next few weeks due to the constant screams of adolescent ladies.

Just Go With It
Damn you, Adam Sandler. Your career is so lukewarm for me. I'm an absolute fan of every other film you do. The others, as I assume will be the case for this particular Rom Com, make me want to gouge out my eyes and ears. Then again, I did enjoy 50 First Dates for the fact that the ending refused to take the easy way out, but I have a feeling Just Go With It will lack the type of humor I crave from your films or the surprising sincerity of, say, Spanglish.

Gnomeo and Juliet
Is this really where we're going now?
I quit.

Big Mommas: Like Father, Like Son
I appreciate that everyone has to eat, but even Martin Lawrence should have passed on this particular sequel. Is this type of stuff even considered comedy anymore? If so, I fear I'll never laugh again.

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