Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Movies to miss in March

Other than the upcoming Alice in Wonderland, March doesn’t have a lot going for it on the ole silver screen. Most offerings are just mediocre, but a few look especially bad, earning a spot on the monthly list of Movies to Miss.

Hot Tub Time Machine- I hope I’m wrong about this one, considering that it has a pretty good cast, but any plot that involves a group of down-on-their-luck men climbing into a hot tub and teleporting back in time to when they were young chick-magnets seems like a bad way to build a movie.

She’s Out of My League- I like Jay Baruchel and I’m happy to see him step into a leading role, but when a comedy’s trailer fails to make me crack a single grin, that’s usually a sign to just pretend said movie doesn’t exist.

Remember Me- I’m recommending everyone stay away from this film for one simple reason: It’s a romantic drama starring everybody’s favorite sparkling bloodsucker, Robert Patinson. Ignoring the fact he’s a tool and probably should be ignored on those grounds alone, can you imagine what the theater is going to be like when this movie is showing? Twilight Moms and Twi-Tweens squealing, swooning and weeping openly for two straight hours…Yeah, no.

Bounty Hunter- Gerard Butler plays a bounty hunter who gets sent after his ex-wife, played by Jennifer Aniston. Eventually the pair get caught up in a murder scandal and find themselves on the run together. My money is on a cliché rekindled romance amidst flying bullets, sub-par action sequences and a hilarious scene where one accidentally walks in on the other one naked (So embarrassing!), but hey, I could be wrong.

5 comments:

Jeff said...

I'm very disappointed in you.
You're going to write off Hot Tub Time Machine because the premise is silly? It's a comedy, man.

I'm not saying it's going to be good. I have no idea. But I sure as shit know it doesn't deserve to be lumped in with She's Out of My League, a formulaic shitfest of a movie that gets made a half dozen times a year.

I've been reading this blog since the beginning, and this is the first time I've strongly disagreed with one of your choices for this post.

Jeff said...

Also, *fart sound*

Good day.

PS: the word verification for this comment was 'dicroq,' which is now the name of my heavy metal band.

-Ryan Winslett said...

LMAO! Like I said, I hope I'm wrong on that one. And just because a movie is a comedy doesn't mean we should have to accept whatever plot is thrown our way. Just saying, based on premise alone, I get the feeling nobody should run off to the theater opening night for this one.

I felt I was very gentle in my pre-judgment of this one. And now, I bid you good day.

-Ryan Winslett said...

No joke, I didn't even see the second part of your second comment, so I totally call dibs on the "good day" for this comment thread.

-Ryan Winslett said...

And Dicroq! I get it!